July 15th, 2007
It seems I caused quite a stir on Facebook with my last entry. Damn that Facebook RSS & Atom import tool. I love you guys! I do have to say I’m not all that interested in sex. You might as well leave that out of the system of equations for me. I just find it completely frustrating that I can’t get anyone to go on a date with me. It’s understandable if I over-do the putting myself down thing, but even when I do not put myself down they cancel. I do act differently around certain people. At least when I introduce myself I’m a calm (almost spelt qualm which is the exact opposite of what I’m being described as by others), quiet, and easygoing guy. I’m not all that “emo.†I really have to thank everyone who left a comment on my Facebook import. I’m glad all of you had something to say to help improve myself in becoming a more sensible man.
I do have good news though. I’ve lived in the same house for almost 22 years now. In those 22 years I never once had my own room. I’ve always shared my room with my brother or I slept on the couch.
Most of you guys know about my dad’s crazy addition that he has been doing for the last 2 years (going on 3 this fall). One of the first rooms to be completed in this addition was my room and bathroom. But I’ve never had the pleasure of having the room that was built specifically for me. My parents master bedroom was completed about a year and a half ago, but did they move into it right away? No.
Since my dad started the addition I’ve slept even slept on the floor aside from sleeping on the couch, while my parents used my room. Things changed about 4 weeks ago my mom finally ordered a bed that was nearly $5,000 dollars. It was one of those Tempurpedic jobs—form body conforming things with reclining abilities. It finally came in a week and a half ago. But as most of you know nothing ever goes right in this house. The guys who were responsible for setting up the mattresses did it wrong. As I sat on the bed to test it out for my mom, the bed collapsed on me. This is not surprising. Everything seems to go wrong for us. The company who my mom ordered the bed from had the nerve to tell us the floors were uneven in the new section of the house. After enough bitching they decided “okay, we’ll come down to fix the bed.†All they did was use the extra parts provided in the box of parts that they decided not to use the first time they were here.
Anyway, with that said and done my parents moved out of my room yesterday leaving me their old bed and furniture. Their bed scares me, and the furniture is something from the 1940s because that’s what they like. They like all the old wood work, whereas I could care-less about it. I believe it’s called the “soapbox-style.â€Â As for that bed, God only knows what my parents have done on that thing, and now I’m sleeping on it. Ew. I asked my mom sometime yesterday when I’d get a new bed… and she said “since we paid half your car insurance this year, not for a long time. Be happy you got your room after all these years.†That kind of suck, but oh well. Can’t argue now.
So it being the first night in my room, I found it to be uneasy. It felt completely unnatural for me to be in a room with a bed that didn’t hurt my back. I tossed and turned for the whole night. In the middle of the night I must have gotten up somewhere around 4 times to get water or even to just walk around. I wanted to go lay on the sofa, but my father was passed out on it. Figures. In the morning my mother asked me how I slept, I honestly told her horrible. I’m sure I’ll get use to it in time before we all have to leave to go back to Rutgers.
July 14th, 2007
It’s about 0409 in the morning right now. I’m sitting in the dark at work alone monitoring Nagios. It’s surely been a quiet night here, but earlier in day (meaning yesterday too) it was quite eventful. I was woken up at about 1030 in the morning and asked to pull the weeds in the backyard by the pool with my brother, so we can set the stone down. I told them they were crazy because I was working the overnight from 0030 till 0900. I soon went back to sleep. I soon was awakened yet again to go do the weeding, and by 1330 I had enough of it—got off my ass and went outside to pull the weeds.
After pulling all the weeds in the back I began my transformation in preparation for today’s little gathering with someone I met over Facebook purely by accident. I was slaving for hours in front of the mirror and in the shower, so that I may look my best (due of the constant and chronic fear of disappointing her). After all, her assumptions of me where based on a photograph (you can’t see all the angles!).
Funny back-story: I added this one girl, let’s say her name is Alexandria (for lack of a better name of a nameless city, damnit I feel like watching Indian Jones), based on fact that she was an Astrophysics major at Rutgers. I didn’t know at the time that she was an incoming freshman for the Fall of 2007. Having her viewing my photos, she said I had beautiful eyes. Shocking isn’t it? There is only one other person who has ever told me that. I find out she has about as much self-esteem as I do—meaning little-to-none. I don’t suppose that’s a bad thing, but only one of us is allowed to have self-loathing issues around here! Ha. So as the conversations progress between her and me, I poke fun at myself, often saying things that are not always true. I poke fun at my cock to my face to my entire body. For those of you that know me, you know it’s fairly common of me to do such a thing when it’s not true, and you also know I’m joking for the most part (and if you don’t… now you do). I’m just too cool like that. Hell I even told her I needed micro-condoms. I can just hear a crowd of people now going, “What the fuck! Micro-penis. More like horse cock.” (Whoever said that on my wall via Facebook shall remain nameless).
Well, I think I did the job of getting her to lay off a bit because we’re not even going to meet now. I probably scared the crap out of her by always calling myself ugly. To be honest in some ways I do find myself ugly. My chin for one isn’t exactly ideal, but hey, I was still a handsome model back in the day. Even my friend Jelly made a point of telling me she doesn’t like my chin because it scares her or some shit like that. I wish I was in shape enough to get back into the saddle again… meaning to model once again. I miss it sometimes, but other times I don’t even want to think about it. Too much work sometimes, but I do miss it. I do miss feeling pretty. I probably would have disappointed her in some way. She probably would have hated me in person.
My drive down to work was eventful. I made it 40 miles to Route 18 without a hitch. God-damn that construction. To keep my Firebird in one piece from time-to-time I’ll drive somewhat half-assed to stay away from the median. I didn’t do that today because there were just too many cars on the road to be dealt with. I can’t stress this enough: too much construction. Just before the George Street exit they closed the right lane, but just before I got in the right lane this one car with people in it drove right past me on the left. The BITCH in the passenger seat screamed “Hey loser!” and spit. The spit wound up directly in my face. I was like: (1) How did she manage to hit me in the face and (2) ‘dear god what the fuck is going on now?’ They soon passed me, as the right lane ended. The girl who spit on my face stuck her hand out and was giving me the bird until they got off at the half-assed exit for 27 North. I was fucking pissed. Another car did that to me the same night, but at least they didn’t spit in my fucking face. I was wondering if I wasn’t in my lane correctly. I’m pretty sure I was. You know, you have a horn, use it.
Now, 0430, almost about time to do the 0430 Console Check. I have to figure out what the fuck I’m doing. I should just go to Atlantic City tomorrow just for the sake of driving my car 100-some-odd miles to run the carburetor cleaner through the engine. Besides, I really don’t feel like going home.
I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me sometimes. This is the second time I’ve had a person canceled their plans on me the night before this week. Am I that unattractive? Am I that fucked up in the head? What is it about me that prevents me from going out with a girl? Damnit. I haven’t been on a date, nor have I had sex, since my ex-girlfriend and I broke up all those years ago. This is sad. I must suck at life. I suck at being a male.
It is now 0454, I have yet to do the Console Check, but my co-worker already went out there and did it. Looks like I’m doing the 0630 rounds.
So far only one good thing has come of this: It took me 3 hours to detail my car, and I couldn’t be happier at how beautiful she looks. All nice and shinny right down to the chrome rims.
July 4th, 2007
“I just wanna be close to you
And do all the things you want me to
I just wanna be close to you
And show you the way I feel”
I think I should get off the computer in this thunderstorm.
July 4th, 2007
Yesterday I went out to see Transformers. To my surprise it wasn’t a bad film. The robots were awesome once you got to see them standing 20 feet tall. I wasn’t bothered by the fact the movie seemed like a long and over drawn General Motors commercial because once you saw them transform it was just awesome. I know a lot of people have problems with the movie being a “sellout†to GM, but whatever. Among other things you had an evil Mustang that was just cool, tanks, choppers, planes, and a robot scorpion. I thought Bumble Bee as a mid-1970 (1974 – 1981 body) style Camaro worked perfectly fine. His emotions carried true to the original Beetle and you can really feel bad for him once he was taken hostage by Sector 7. The only thing that killed it for me was all the filthy humans. I was like, “Less filthy humans and more robot destruction! Come’on!” Every time there was some kind of action sequence with robots fighting you would often see the camera going off to view humans fighting back and running for cover. More robots please.
They also handed out the “Transformers Movie Prequel” sponsored in part by Target (almost as evil as Walmart, but not quite). I’ve taken it upon myself to scan the comic at 600 dpi because not everyone who gets to see the movie gets a free comic book. It’s a shame, so without further interruption here is your download! I made it into a CBR file, so you might want to get the comic book reader or re-name *.cbr to *.zip.
By the way, happy Independence Day! Now, go watch Will Smith kick some alien ass!