June 29th, 2007
As most of you know I have/had a heart problem for the last 3 or so years. Until recently I was told not to partake in any stressful activity, but as of a month or so ago I was told I could. I haven’t done jack shit in the month that I was told I could start working out, having sex, distance running, and most importantly… jerking off (haha). Maybe I can get back into modeling! It has been nearly 2 years since I did anything. I miss it… for as much as I hated it because I’m one ugly fuck.
Now, as of about 2 hours ago I started working out. I figured why not do it at 12am, since I had work in 24 hours. I started working out very (very, very, very) lightly of course. I can’t even do my own body weight anymore. I could only do about a 3rd or even less. If things couldn’t be any worse, my ass is fat (I can practically palm the fat. Just think it used to be hard as a rock). My stomach lost all it’s tone that I had back when I started college, my caves lost 2 inches. To do a simple jog, 1600 meters took me 14 minutes and 47 seconds. Just think I used to do 3.1 miles in 14 minutes and 57 seconds (I think that was my best time senior year in high school). After I got done with the mile jog/walk, I fell to the floor in a pile of sweat and in sharp pain in my chest. I finally decided to roll over from the pain and write this little blurb. I’m so going back to the doctor and bitching at him.
I wonder how long it will take for me to get back into shape, and lose all the fat. If I can get myself to either lose 25 pounds or lose the fat in my ass and stomach I’ll be trilled. Why am I tempted to work out? Why not? Why not from the day I was told I was healthy? Stressed for one, I’ve had way too much on my mind lately dealing with te RIAA and MPAA. In spite of everything else, I would like to say I’m tempted to work out because like any story it’s all about a girl [/spider-man quote].
June 16th, 2007
After another beautiful let down again today, I set on my journey home. It was approximately 2:04 pm when I left Busch Campus at Rutgers. I was on my way up north on the New Jersey Turnpike. There was mild traffic, where I soon broke away from the crowd, where it became peaceful. This was suddenly going to change in a heart beat.
Around 2:40 pm it was just me, and this other truck (I think it was black, it was definitely a dark color & Jersey plates) in the slow lane going about 55 MPH near exit 13. Slow, isn’t it? As I get into the middle lane to pass the poor guy, this other truck (white & out of state driver) comes rocketing down the fast lane. She was driving so fast that it shook my poor Firebird. I slowed up as she passed me, where she cut in front of me, and then into the slow lane. Why she did that was beyond me. She then rammed the dark colored truck in the ass sending it the truck spinning into the center divider. I slammed on my breaks because it was only about 40 feet in front of me. Pieces from both the trucks are flying all over the place. I narrowly missed the poor dark truck by mere feet by the time he passed me. The lady in the white truck was still ahead of me driving before she stopped a mile up the road away from the victims she just smashed into. To say the least I wish I had my phone on me to call the 9-1-1. I didn’t even stop. Damn it… I’m bad.
When I got home it was 3:06 pm, I rushed to the news, but nothing was on Channel 61 Traffic and Weather for New Jersey, nor on New Jersey Channel 12. It’s now 4:43 pm and I still have yet to see anything about the accident on any news station (ABC, NBC, CBS, Fox, News 12, etc…). I really hope the guy and his family in the dark SUV are alright. I’ll be updating this entry if I see any more information on the news or wherever.
June 14th, 2007
Today was nothing exciting. The day started out with a bang when I sat in an hour of traffic going down the New Jersey Turnpike. The hour delay was due, but not limited to the following: There was a bus on it’s side, two flat tires. An over turned tractor trailer and two people probably pulled over for speeding.
I finally get to work at 9:44 am, where I am called into a conference room to discuss my performance during a power outage on Busch & Livingston campus Monday night at 10:02 pm. I failed to follow procedure to the point where I didn’t call one person back, reply to my email in a timely matter, and for not having neat hand writing on this sheet I had to fill out. The talk was about an hour or so long where I was like, “okay, sorry, it’s all my fault.” That just set the tone for my whole work day. Sitting there at my desk all pissed off for the next 8 hours. Pretty much made me want to put in my two week notice then and there because this is the second time I’ve fucked up during a power outage.
At times I have to say Facebook is a fun place to browse. It’s an addiction that is hard to deal with, at least for myself. I just spend the day at work reading peoples’ public notes. Catching up on those I don’t get a chance to see. Leave hellos on “friends” walls’. That pretty much came to an end when I commented one someone’s wall and then they removed me as their friend. It happens a lot, but this time I was just wondering why. I asked a co-worker who was also a friend of hers why she removed me—he replied, “Well, to tell you the truth Jon, no one really likes you. They just use you for what you have. No one wants to be your friend.” He laughs. His words rang in my ears, burring with anger as I just sat back down and sulked for the remainder of the day. I thought to myself, well he’s right no one wants to be my friends when I look and act the way I do.
Come to think about it, he was right. I like to be kind and helpful to others as much as I can. However, almost all the people I know are always asking me for something. People asking for rides, books, cds, programs. I had one such case where someone from one of my classes said, “I’m glad I don’t have to see yourface anymore because class is finally over!“Â The one really hurt my feelings at the time. What little feelings I have left. I try not to think about it as bad as it sounds. I don’t know. Just thought I’d throw that out there. You know, class is over, we can still hang out for non-work related shit. Hell, I can’t even get one of my friends to hang out with me. She’s always canceling plans on me after she says when to hang out. Grr, I usually have to clear my days ahead of schedule to hang out due to all the weird hours I work.
The only friends I really had were those online, but even they stopped talking to me. I could be having a conversation with them online and they just vanish, stop talking to me, and don’t say a word. Is it me? Probably. It’s usually all my fault. This addiction to facebook has to stop on my behalf. I don’t even know 200 of the 210 people remaining on my friend list. They were probably all just random add from poking or browsing. To be realistic the only people I know are the people from my high school, all 40 or so of them. Most of the people who used to pick on me and call me names too.
I was out the door at 6:01 pm (quitting time). I was on my way to meet up with my old friend Quynh. Her suggestions to me were to go to bars like she did to find someone. I’m glad it worked for her! I just don’t see myself sitting in a bar anytime soon. Maybe… who knows? No one really talks to me anymore online or in person. Well, that’s life! Move on. The food was good.
In conclusion I would like to state—all those who do not wish to be my friend on here please remove me now from all forms a contact.
June 5th, 2007
All that has to be said is “rain,” but here is the story. I was driving right out of the toll getting off the New Jersey Turnpike to Route 18/1 North.
It all happened where the road after the toll splits into two exits. 18/1 North to the right, and 18 South to the left (as most of you from the New Brunswick or New Jersey in gerneral should know by now).
I was going to take 18/1 North, when this little car decides he doesn’t wanna go south, cuts in front of me while we’re going into that turn. The road is already wet, nice and slick due to the rain.
Going into the turn, the little car cuts me off, I step on the breaks, but it was too wet, so I lost control of the car and I do a complete 180. Five cars just barely missed me. It was pretty much as scene out of a movie. I landed straight facing the direction of traffic right in the shoulder lane. (The thing that cops usually use to pass people.. and the wonderful ****s that love to pass you.) In all, I missed the guard rail by inches.
I got out followed by “AMEN…” looked at the car not a dent or scratch. In my infinite wisdom I was like alright, I can drive now, well I pull out and almost get hit by a truck.. so screw that. Waited for everyone to be gone with… and made it to work safely after the fact.
Lesson in the learning—Rip out the Open Diff and put in LSD.. something I’ve been meaning to do since I got the car.